Title : What would I become in 10 years...

11 years ago, I was seated next to my desk, doing an essay homework given by my beloved English teacher, Mrs. Wong, while brushing my head with a pen, trying hard to spill creative points over the topic 'What would I become in 10 years..'. I remember how the brainstorming had worked in a way that lead me to dream what will I be in 10 years time. Being at boarding school, studying science stream subjects somehow pictured me that I will end up in medical line in 10 years time. And that was it. I end up composed that I'll become a doctor.

But somehow, the reality was not as I had pictured it would be. Though I continue further my study in matriculation programme doing Pure Sciences, when it was time when we were required to apply for the University we wish to enroll our first degree, I filled in 'Bachelor of Education, Guidance & Counselling'. And that's what I become ever since, a degree holder student counsellor. And currently on leave.. (Wife's duty call)

Some people questioned my sudden changes of study field. I agree that it was so unexpected of me. I did pretty good during my SPM. Some friends remarked that for someone with pretty good results, I should have end in a better career. I should study in different field, earning more, maybe lived better.

One thing popped to my mind each time I came to think about this. 'Am I not living a better life now?' I must be so ungrateful to think that way. Yes, it's true that I never thought that I'll live this lifestyle, this surrounding, this new environment, which were alien to me 10 years ago. I am more than grateful, in fact I am so thankful, thankful to God for this life I live.

This life I live now is truly a challenge, that tests my ability how to wisely divide my time between my role as a wife, a mother, and understanding the importance of being a spouse to a diplomat. And not to forget, me as a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister, a member of Embassy, a Malaysian abroad, and a loyal government servant. At first, things did freak me out, but when time moves on, I think I am almost prepared to carry myself in this multitasking role of life.

Being a full time housewife, some might say, I never earn money, doing nothing at home, lazying all day, shopping with husband's earnings. Some might be true, but maybe we should look at it at different angle. I may not having steady income, but at the same time I have steady sources to look after my growing son, and plenty of time to master the domestic skills needed to become a good wife. I love shopping, and sometimes I crave for designer's handbag and shoes. I know that if I really persisted in wanting things I want, I could get one, and my husband will never say no, as he always being so nice to me, and willing to spend money for me. I know he have the capability to fulfil my 'demand' but I refrained myself from the thought. That money can be use to buy much necessary things, especially for our growing son and the coming baby, and for me, his need always become my priority, along with my husband.

Talking about designer item, most people I met especially the working ladies suggested that I should collect LV brand, Gucci brand, or Ferragamo brand.. I know these brands are really famous, and quite cheap to buy in Europe than in Malaysia, but my heart just not yet really into them. Yes, I like the idea to own one, plus points - they have lots of nice design, and very stylish, really elegant. But even in Europe, I still find the prices are still considerably dear. To be honest, I still prefer Malaysian's product, and we do have our own various selective of good brand such as Sembonia, and Bonia. Might be expensive to some person, but the quality they have worth the price. And for shoes, currently I prefer Bata.. cheap, comfortable and easy to wear, the only minus point is the lack of style.. umm.. there's always price to pay when one is looking for comfort.

And here I am, 11 years after I wrote the essay 'What would I become in 10 years time'. I am now a full time housewife, a mother, a school counsellor on leave.. perhaps I could be the 'house doctor', still with the 'doctor's job' but not in medical line, more to domestic.

To readers out there, it's true we have to plan our future, and by doing that we'll always have good guides on how to manage our life well. But never forget, future is something mysterious. In the end, we'll somehow find something that we really wanted. Life is full with trials and errors. Before you decide on something, weight it carefully, and think about the pros and cons. But when you've make your decision, put all your strength together and believe you're making the right decision. And trust in prayers. But when things doesn't turn exactly the way we wanted, remember, there's still lots of opportunity lying around. Don't look at one closed door, but keep searching for the open doors around. It's hard, I know, but it's not possible.

again.. forgive my grammar. :)